i think i've finally put the finger squarely on this rut i've fallen into recently. i just want an unhampered, long, deep conversation with someone. it seems long overdue now. i feel intellectually bored with the kind of 'conversations' i share with most people, which essentially boil down to brief quips, quick draw one liners, and talk of topical issues, or the weather. it makes my mind feel insipid and shallow. i'm feeling rusty in the communication department, although my reclusive behavior isn't much help for me.

i'm leaving for maryland later this afternoon. i'm thrilled at the thought of ample snow and old friends. a couple of my regulars, bob and susan, donated a pair of boots for my trip and bought new socks for me, i was really touched by that sort thoughtfulness. it's few and far between, and so i'd like to organize something nice for them.

i recently broke my camera. thankfully, it's more so a superficial error than anything (the outer edge of the lens.), but i managed to get some gravel dust on my lens as well and i'm not pleased about it. i'm pushing back the date for my stop-motion, this wasn't quite as productive a week as i had hoped for.

i'm not sure who uses/reads livejournal anymore, it seems like more and more people are making tumblrs these days (i'm not sure if i can take myself seriously enough to have my own blog.), but i do have a flickr account now, which is really all i need.

so if you have a chance, you can check out any recent work on flickr at christopher chittick.

and if you have a flickr account it would be rad to be friends.



thanks.

Worst. semester. ever?

But academia will be over after Friday is done, unless I don't pass this one class, which screws up everything, but I can't do jackshit about that now.  Ugh.  Then I'm off to Glasgow in two weeks!

On the other hand, that means I can't actually get started on treating my ~*clinical depression*~.  Whateverrrr.

i think i've come to the conclusion that i'd like to make films for a living, and i don't mean videotaping weddings or anything like that. no, fuck that. i want to create and combine imagery and sound to weave together something emotionally stirring and heartfelt, i want to make something i can have faith in. mikey made a excellent point about meaningful imagery, and i realize i have the ability to create nice pictures, but i'd like to graduate from that, i want to take it to the next level. i just want to make something meaningful. i want to fill a theater with teary eyed patrons.

the stop motion is coming along well, i'm really excited, anxious, and proud about it. it's going to be nothing more than a montage of different movements set to music, there is some symbolism if you follow the song, but i don't know whether or not to introduce a couple of actors. i'm not sure it'll be necessary, but i'm still trying to come up with ideas in that direction. i don't want dialouge, i think that actions and expressions can convey alot on their own.

i'm starting to understand how some americans get annoyed by international behavior. working at a coffee shop in a town where there are a lot of international travelers has opened my eyes a little bit on the issue (and i'll be the first to admit that both sides are at fault). the majority of canadians and europeons that stroll in have some sort of quip to say about american living or some comment about this or that as if i'm a travel agent or spokesperson for my country. i didn't chose to be american i was just born in this country, i don't support our political system, and i'm abhorred by the behavior some of my fellow countrymen, but i think it's fucked and elitist to visit a foreign country and talk shit about it to natives.. what's the deal? there's culture shock, and then there's just being a out-and-out jackass.

what also gets me is the people who don't travel their country at all. i mean i've been cross country several times and i can testify that the united states isn't just a handful of large cities and a big shit hole surrounding them, i don't think people realize this.